Kilometer 3504: breaking the waves

It’s impossible to set a tent in such a way that the call for prayer from the nearest mosque doesn’t wake you up at sunrise. It’s impossible to run away from – not just buzz, actual scream – of cicadas. It’s impossible not to inhale at least half a packet of cigarettes a day. I tend to irritate my friends a bit, being a hangover-free individual. No matter what goes on the night before, in the morning I wake up fresh and ready for the new day. Today, dear friends, I would like to offer you all the sympathy and empathy that I have, as I have felt your pain. The ubiquitous cigarette fog made me understand that grass can move loudly, almost no water is wet enough to cure you and those cicadas, they really don’t know when to stop.

Why almost no water? Well, because the Black Sea can do it. When the tourists, who allegedly are present here in summer decide that the weather is not summery enough, the sun is hiding behind the clouds and the waves don’t let them float peacefully on their crocodile-shaped mattresses, the local teenagers and the not‑quite‑teenagers go to wrestle with the sea. The residents of a tiny village on the outskirts of Trabzon teach us how to approach the three-meter-high waving monsters – that’s so much fun! At this point I would like to thank my mom for the Tangle Teezer she got me for Christmas, as without it I would have seaweed in my hair forever and after.